Our card of the week The Warrior of Moritsoana or Cups shows us the difference between fantasy and reality. We can all dream the perfect dream but are we prepared to put in the effort to achieve those dreams. How realistic are they? I do say that when we dream we need to begin that dream with ‘in a perfect world’.
But our worlds are not perfect sometimes we limit ourselves, for a variety of reasons, but more often than not it’s not because we believe, but because we believe we do not deserve it. We are unworthy. This week we can afford to be a tad idealistic, to dream the impossible dream. Why not be able to have the happily ever after…
Well known and beloved fairy tales share a common theme. The forlorn, orphaned young person is cast out or cursed or put upon by evil stepmothers, sisters etc. After various trials and tribulations (usually lasting 100 years) she is saved by an act of kindness usually by a prince or knight in shining armour.
The message from all these stories is that no matter what your circumstances, if we truly believe in ourselves, something or someone will come to our rescue. The Universe always knows what is in our hearts. When we put out the right vibrations we alert all that is around us, in turn we receive the energy needed. The awakening kiss of Grace.
We live in times of instant gratification. We don’t want to wait for the saviour, we want a quick fix – we want it all … NOW! Life is like a fine wine, some things take time to mature and develop into their full potential. Patience, all good things come to those who wait.
Another theme that runs through all the stories and fables is being pure of heart. I can’t think of a fairy tale or parable where the evil ugly sister got the prince. So as we dream to be fulfilled, saved or transformed, we need to consider our motivation and intent. Why do we want what we want? Why do we feel that life is not living up to our expectations? How realistic are those expectations? What trials and tribulations do we need to go through to reach the nirvana we desire. Are we ready for the life we dream of?
Often we confuse feelings of lust with romantic or true love, which is all flowers and candles and unconditional. True love is a state of Grace not the sentimental love that Hollywood propagates, but rather the even flow of the poetry of life. The beauty of heightened senses. That glorious wash of emotion, clear and true without the attachments of need and greed.
The Fairy tales we learn as children, set up our vision of the future. This system becomes the foundation for our emotional intelligence. As we mature our intellect so too should we mature our emotions. Most of us don’t, we hang onto that system or foundation that we set up as children. We aspire to the ‘happy ever after’. We look at the end result and somehow are able to gloss over and turn a blind eye to the pain and suffering that was endured before the ever after moment. When we experience pain and suffering we are confused. Why is life so difficult? We need to go back and mature the child within, so that as adults we have age appropriate responses to our mates, family and friends.
We also tend to do this with real life people. We hold up Ghandi, Mandela and Mother Theresa as icons for humanity. Which of us would have been able to live their lives? Even for a day. To undergo the difficulties they lived through and still be able to maintain a purity of spirit.
Our lesson this week is learning to love personally and unconditionally. We need to master our instincts and develop a way to control our enthusiasm and expectations. There will be a fair amount of fire and passion around, so be prepared to fall in love or to experience feelings deeper than ever before.
Be prepared to experience the heights of joy and the depths of despair. Both are valid in our existence, both teach us valuable lessons. Sometimes in our darkest moments we find our own inner light. We journey on with hope. We begin to love unconditionally and we shine our light.
The Basotho military system was not unlike the Zulu, in the calling up of youths to form guilds at the time of their initiation into manhood. These groups could be mobilised to serve as regiments for the chief in wartime.
These regiments were usually led by men of royal blood from within the ranks. The warriors did not have specific regimental dress but could be distinguished by their winged shields, designed to deflect spears in flight. They would be armed with light throwing spears or an axe.
Warriors would paint their clan totems on their shields. “Ba” indicates “People of” – and the name of their totem. Examples; Name: Bahlaping – Totem is a Fish (Tlhapi) or BaKwêna totem is the crocodile (Kwêna). Their headgear was black ostrich feathers.
Family Tradition In Sesotho, the words for father (ntate) and mother (mme) are also commonly used as address forms of respect for one’s elders. Politeness, good manners, and willingness to serve are values very strongly encouraged in children. The general attitude toward childhood is well summarised by the proverb Lefura la ngwana ke ho rungwa, which roughly translates as “Children benefit from serving their elders.”
The standard greetings in Sotho reflect this attitude of respect towards age. When greeting an elder, one should always end with ntate (my father) or mme (my mother). Words for brother (abuti) and sister (ausi) are used when one talks to people of the same age. A child who answers an adult’s question with a simple “Yes” is considered impolite. To be polite, the child needs to add “my father” or “my mother”.
Hospitality and generosity are expected. Even those who have very little will share their food with visitors. Of course, those who share also expect the favour to be returned when it is their turn to visit.